[Oh he recognizes that look. It's the look Tadashi used to give him when he caught him in a lie. He promptly ignores it, looking just past Bellamy's head as he shrugs.] I'm not Baymax. I can recharge just fine by resting. [Neglecting to mention who Baymax is: the life.]
...Octavia kinda told me a little bit about what you found on the ground. ["Mentioned a dude named Lincoln." He picks up on the tone though and it's the reason he doesn't say "you guys" or anything. He knows Bellamy enough by now to realize that the man probably bulldozed his way through and made things happen. They're similar that way.] Doesn't seem much different than watching what's out here. I'm used to being on the lookout from the sky though.
[He narrows his eyes.] I have, too. [Not this many nights in a row, however, and the wear and tear's a bit more obvious.] I used to pull a lot of all-nighters back home. It drove my aunt crazy.
[He shouldn't ask. He shouldn't, but he knows if he doesn't it'll keep bothering him.] ...what's been keeping you up anyway?
[But then he frowns a little, because, well, he loves and trusts Octavia, but there's no telling what her version of events might be. His sister is as quick to his defense as she is to call him out on his shit.] We found a lot more shit than we were expecting. People included.
We had a wall. We watched from behind it, mostly. But we learned how to move through the trees too. At least it prepared me for guard duty here.
[Bellamy narrows his eyes right back.] All nighters at home are a little different from all nighters in a war zone.
[The better question would be what doesn't keep him up? Sometimes it feels like the list rotates, alternates, repeats itself; each night could be something else. Nightmares always seems to be a Big Theme, but it's just one part of his life at this point. He's forgotten what it was like to not have them.]
[He tries for blase. It's enemy territory, duh.] In case you haven't noticed, we're smack dab in Glaschu.
[There's a very tiny grin as he shifts, reaching into his pocket for something.] Baymax is my best friend from home...some people probably think that's weird since he's a robot, but. [He shrugs and he pulls his hand out of his pocket. Bellamy can probably see the translucent green computer chip, complete with the fading sticker of the smiley doctor and the even more faded tape that barely says TADASHI HAMADA. He holds the chip between two fingers, staring at it instead of Bellamy.] Remember how I said my friends and I are heroes? That includes Baymax, too. I built his armor so that we could fly and check things out from the air. [And because it was really awesome.] ...when I get back, I'm gonna rebuild him. But when the imps brought me here I had pieces of him in my box of stuff. [A beat.] I was unpacking at my lab when they showed up and I didn't want to lose the box.
[With that, Baymax's chip goes back into his pocket.] She mentioned that, too. About meeting people on the ground, but nothing about a wall. [Kinda reminds him of Eren a little.] I don't even know if I've ever asked how long you guys were on the ground before you got here.
[He doesn't give in to that, just keeping that level stare. Sorry, Bell, you're not gonna win. He's had practice...but he's ignoring him. Bellamy's right. All nighters here are different than all nighters back home so instead of verbally responding he settles for curling up a little further into his sweater and leaning into the tree.
He blinks though. That's hardly a cause for anything, considering what else he knows about Bellamy. It's something to worry about, yes, but at the same time...] Being in Glaschu's something to worry about, sure, but this also isn't your first time here. That's why Clarke sent me with you. [i.e. nice try but try again.]
[He doesn't have thoughts one way or another on a robot best friend, if only because he catches sight of the chip and the name in place on it. It's his brother's, or at least Tadashi is connected to Baymax somehow, and it explains some of the focus on the chip when Hiro held it.] Could you rebuild him here? I mean, your suit's been altered, maybe Baymax could be too. [He wants to ask what happened that the robot needs to be rebuilt in the first place, but he's not sure it's a good question to ask right now.]
We built it for defense, once we realized we weren't alone. Our original camp's gone now, but the Ark followed us, put up a brand new wall with it. [Does he sound bitter at the Ark?? Yes, absolutely, always. He pauses though, thinks. How long were they on the Ground? It felt like an impossibly long time, but it couldn't have been more than two months.] A couple weeks. We've been here longer.
[Excuse you, Hiro, Bellamy has a little sister, so he's got just as much practice with the whole leveled stare thing. He doesn't necessarily give in either, but it does make him a little less stubborn about hiding how tired he is. He sinks back into a tree himself with a sigh.] And because sending you by yourself wasn't the best idea. I wanted to come check out the riots for myself anyway. I've been to Parrais and Daona, but not this middle of nowhere. Pretty sure Glaschu's not the thing keeping you awake either.
[And like that, he sort of deflates all over again, hand balling up inside his pocket to protect the chip.] Mm-mm. I don't think I could rebuild him. [A pause.] I tried. A lot. When I first got here and realized I actually could rebuild him at all I tried for a long time and it just wasn't functioning right. So instead this is how things are. Maybe I could make something similar but it wouldn't be Baymax. And anyway the monarchs are the ones who altered my suit, not me. They'd have to alter Baymax for me and...I don't know if I want them to do that.
[He'll share what happened in due time, probably. Maybe. For now he's letting his attention shift.] So really what you're saying is that it was less of a wall and more of a cage. Something to keep you guys boxed in and "safe" from outsiders. [He doesn't know anything about the grounders and how dangerous they were, but it seems strange to him.] It's weird how long we've been here.
[Well see, then Bellamy should know that the younger sibling always wins by default. His free hand is twisting and tugging on the fabric of his hoodie, fingers digging into the cuff of his sleeve as he thinks about that. Okay, that's a fair point.] Maybe Glaschu's not the thing keeping me awake but it's the new thing. Lately I've been going places I shouldn't be going. Things tend to happen in those places, so...just kinda more on guard than usual.
[There's another pause, and then, quickly:] Can I ask you something?
[It's the emphasis on him that puts it into more perspective.] No, you're right. If you want it to be him like he's supposed to be, I wouldn't trust the monarchs to get it right either.
[Which is probably the first time Bellamy has hinted at his less than stellar monarch feelings in front of Hiro, but moving along.]
[He makes a face.] It was a wall, around our camp and the dropship. [A beat.] They tore it down, in the end, but it kept us safe as long as it needed to.
[Bellamy already knows there's far more keeping Hiro awake, but at least he's admitting it. He uses it as an excuse to avoid talking about himself for now.] "Things tend to happen" is pretty vague. This relate to the Shuck? [Because lbr - the Shuck can be fucking terrifying, and he already knows Hiro left the encounter worse for wear. Quendi falls under places he shouldn't be going.]
[A quick nod. He's not sure when he stopped minding random questions like this.] What?
[Nobody can ever be Baymax but Baymax. And if he can't rebuild Baymax, he's not risking his best bud like that. He doesn't say anything but the look he shoots Bellamy is enough to tell him everything he needs to know. He trusts the monarchs on a base level, but not as much as he probably could. Not with everything. But he's playing nice and protecting the Unseelie and their cause for now.
He's not hearing the difference, really.] It's still a barrier to trap you in. But if it kept you safe in the end, I guess it doesn't matter anymore. [Things in Bellamy's world are still confusing sometimes.
His nostrils flare a bit in response. Yes it relates to Shuck, but he's not exactly sure he's ready to broach that. So instead, he waves a hand to blow it off for this very moment to charge ahead and flip the questions back to Bellamy. That response should also be enough to confirm that that's a yes. He'll explain soon enough.
And really, most likely Bellamy stopped minding them around the time he accidentally adopted a Disney character.] ...have you had any weird dreams lately?
[Bellamy just rolls his eyes.] It didn't trap us. Not like the Ark did, not even like the dropship did. [Because there's a difference, at least to him. The wall kept them safe without trapping them, ruling over them. It did it's job before they needed something else, as the world kept growing around them.]
[There's a lot of brush offs happening, but Bellamy's not particularly surprised. He doesn't even mind the dream question at the moment, because, well, he'd been intending to ask Hiro about a dream.]
Weird's a pretty broad definition here. [A beat.] Good weird, bad weird? Ridiculous, horrifying, dwarven?
[Agree to disagree, Bellamy. Hiro's unable to really grasp what he's saying but maybe later he'll agree with him. For now though he's more focused on what's happening here and what he's asking the older guy.
So. When Bellamy mentions exactly what he's thinking Hiro fixes him with a flat sort of look before his hand digs into the ground next to him, fistful of leaves suddenly flying toward Bellamy's face.]
So you do know what I'm asking you. [He rolls his eyes.] ...Jason called and he told me that Clarke told him about a certain dream she had last night. You had it, too? I didn't get a ton of the details.
[To say he wasn't expecting leaves to be thrown in his face is an understatement. Had he not realized what Hiro was doing, that sort of gesture and toss might've caused him to react more defensively - instead he just gets one look at Hiro's face, and his own breaks into the smallest of grins.]
No, I didn't know, but it's the second time Clarke and I had that dream. We thought it'd be a good idea to ask you about it.
[But then he just kind of launches into it. Neither of them are sleeping, the dream is important - there's no point in keeping it from Hiro.] It was a bunch of mechanical monsters. Presumably built by dwarves, but they're just - wrecking everything in their path. Spreading fire, targeting spires, and it looked like they definitely had shards for eyes. You get any sign of that when you poked around?
[There are more details he could give if asked, but he already looks pretty alarmed by rehashing the small bit so far.]
[He's pouting. He knows he's pouting but he also doesn't realize the way that he's comfortable around Bellamy right now, the way he's let his guard drop entirely and the way he's closing the distance half-tempted to dump more leaves on Bellamy's head.
The real reason he's getting closer though is to lower his voice. He doesn't trust Glaschu and he sure as hell doesn't want anyone hearing about this particular piece of the puzzle.]
Yeah...? Jason mentioned that. [There's an awkward, almost guilty pause.] I...haven't had a chance to go look yet. [That's the problem. After Quendi, things kinda go out of hand.] As soon as we get back to Dorchadas, I'm gonna grab Loki and we have to go. We can't wait any longer.
[He scrubs a hand over his face, blinking sleepily but powering through it for the time being. This is too important.] What else did you see? I need to know what we're really looking for.
[If he's noticed Hiro moving closer, there's no sign of it. Instead, he just pulls out a knife and cuts his finger, drawing a silence rune on the tree behind them. Just in case.]
I wasn't sure if you might've seen hints of it, when you tried talking to the dwarves the last time.
[Don't think he doesn't notice the sudden sullenness. He kind of wishes they didn't have to talk about this right now, not when Hiro's already in a not so great state, but there's no way to let it go, especially if Hiro's going there soon.]
They were built of shit like cogs and gears. The sounds they made - like iron meeting steel, nothing animal or humanlike, and they looked a little dragonlike, especially in the mouth. Everything was already on fire in the dream, but I'm pretty sure the machines had to be most of the cause.
[It's better not to point it out anyway just in case he realized it and backed away. He shakes his head though in response.]
I didn't get inside the city when I talked to them last time, just Redgate. I didn't want to push my luck before I even established anything, but you've heard the rumors, right? They're kicking everybody out. It's gonna be even harder to get inside now.
[He's burying a hand in his hair, tugging a little partially to keep himself awake and partially to keep himself grounded. He doesn't like the sound of this. Judging from some of the things he did learn about the dwarves and knowing that a certain Seelie had an apprenticeship there and was learning certain things, he doesn't like the idea at all.]
There's nothing proving that it's them making these things. [...but who else could it be, realistically?] We also don't know the vision's gonna come true. [It's clear he's starting to be a little more freaked out by the idea though.] ...if Loki and I get in, we'll keep an eye out. I'm just really, really hoping they're only dreams and not another thing we've gotta worry about.
[He's heard the rumors, and he hates to say it kind of lines up. If they're kicking people out, it means they're doing something they don't want anyone to see.]
[He doesn't like the idea of Hiro going there now either, especially in the wake of the difficulties, but -] When you go, take my knife. The teleporting one. I want you to be able to get out of there fast.
[He can deal without having it for a day or so, if it means Hiro has a means of escape.]
Some of the visions people've had in the past have come true, or started to come true, or've been partially true. I don't like that we've had this one again, months after the first time back in February.
You're right. It doesn't necessarily mean it's an absolute, but it'd be stupid to not be cautious. If they're making monsters with shards for eyes, it means they've built up a collection of shards too.
[He has Clarke's teleportation ring now, but he knows if he and Loki are both going they're going to need a fast out, just in case. He doesn't want to argue it and honestly? Any extra security is good.] Definitely. And I'll bring it back...promise. [It's also his way of saying he promises to get out of there alive. He hopes. He nods in agreement, sinking further into his sweater as he thinks on that. Has anyone ever told him that? He's not sure now.]
I don't like that it's reoccurring either. I've got a few people I could ask but...[Well, they're Seelie. He's not going to even try just yet.] We're going to be really cautious until we figure out what's going on, and probably even more so when we have the answers. [A beat.] What bugs me is the fact that they have shards for eyes. If that's true...where did the dwarves get the shards in the first place? If they're the ones really making these things.
[And why are they making them is the other question.]
[He nods once, recognizing it for the promise it is.] Try not to lose it. [That part's teasing.]
[Bellamy absently wipes his bleeding finger and hand on his pants.] Your guess is as good as mine, though hopefully you'll end up with more than a guess.
Feels like just about every side is after shards. If the dwarves've got a hoard, it makes me wonder how long they've been collecting, or who might be handing them over. They pretty much lock themselves away and hate people, right? Hard to imagine them shard hunting.
Very funny. You've gotta trust me at least a little more than that. [But even before Bellamy can really just wipe off his finger Hiro's grabbing his hand, hardly thinking anything of it as he uses a bit of his healing magic to close the small cut.]
If I come out of there with only a guess, the whole thing's gonna be for nothing. [And he refuses to let it be so.] I had that same thought. It's not so much that they hate people but they totally believe shardbearer business is shardbearer business. They'll do whatever it takes to keep themselves protected though. That's the thing. If they think this is the best way...it makes you wonder what they know or what they think that's making them so desperate. But I wanna know who's handing them over, too. Other shardbearers? The Cult? We have too many options.
[He does, though. If he hadn't trusted Hiro, he wouldn't have made the offer in the first place. Only when the kid heals him does he remember he was bleeding, too used to worse, but it's enough to distract him from that area of conversation.]
[Dryly:] The world is ending. Pretty sure that makes anyone take it up a level in what they feel is necessary to survival. [And, you know, even when it's not technically ending, but the Void looming certainly hammers that home.] Maybe they just think Shardbearers suck at this point like half the rest of the population does.
[He lets out an exhausted, bitter sigh.] Wouldn't be surprised if it was the Cult, to be honest.
We aren't gonna get answers now, just - keep it all in mind, when you go looking.
Pre-emptive strike in a way. [The world sure is ending. It's a fact they've known for some time now with the way the Void loomed but it was something they all managed to ignore for a small time while fixated on other things. It's much harder to ignore now.] The Natives think we suck because members of the Cult and some of the Seelie have told them we suck, more or less. I'm getting really sick of fighting off multiple things.
But I'm always keeping them in mind. For all we know, we're going to be among them in the riots tomorrow. Maybe that's what worries me a little more. We never know.
Hell of a preemptive strike. [Once upon a time, he might have mourned Hiro's age with how beaten down he sounds, but he's used to it, and not even in a cynical way. Keeping track of multiple fronts is always difficult, especially when it's someone that young - but they do it anyway. He's seen it too much.]
The Cult can be anywhere. Wouldn't be surprised if they're helping instigate the riots. [He really hopes they aren't there though - he'd rather them not pick him out of the crowd.]
[He nudges Hiro a little with his elbow.] Cult's not keeping you awake with everything else, is it?
[He says it vaguely sympathetically. Bellamy is more than familiar what that feelings is like.]
Tell me about it. [He runs a hand through his hair again. He doesn't expect Bellamy to feel bad for him. He's not even sure how he feels about all of these things. It's a lot and it's building and stacking, threatening to overwhelm him entirely...but he's fine for now.] It'd be good cover for them, really. Get everyone's attention off of them so they can execute their next attack. People use distraction tactics all the time. I've seen it before.
[Like when Callaghan used the fire as an excuse to steal Hiro's microbots, for instance.
The little nudge brings him back to reality though and he looks up at Bellamy with wide eyes. For a moment it's so startlingly familiar that he's not sure what to do and he stares before reminding himself that despite how it may seem sometimes, Bellamy isn't Tadashi. There's a deep inhale as he debates how to answer, if he wants to give him the truth or just a lie of omission. In the end, he shakes his head.]
Sort of. There's a ton of stuff to think about here and that includes the Cult. [He's really only addressed this with Jason before, and even then it was more Jason knew because Jason understood. Actually verbalizing it is a whole other animal.] Sleeping's always been a little weird since Tadashi died, even though it's been almost two years if you count the time we've spent here.
[He doesn't outright say it, but it should be enough to let Bellamy know just how recent Tadashi's death is.] Sometimes I still dream about home. Sometimes they're good dreams, and sometimes they're not. That's all.
[He frowns a little, briefly wondering what specifically Hiro has seen, but he doesn't ask.] Distraction works. It's old as hell, but there's a reason it's still around as a tactic. The important part is picking up on when it's being used on you.
[There's a small moment of hesitation when Hiro looks up at him like that, but at least it doesn't scare him. It doesn't even make him uncomfortable. When Hiro starts talking about Tadashi though - Bellamy's body sinks, not in uncertainty but just recognition of the moment for what it is. And he listens.]
You realize how vague that sounds, right? [The words are dismissive strung together like that, but his tone is concerned. Two years, and Tadashi died right before Hiro got yanked into another world. He kind of has the urge to just drop a blanket on the kid's head.] That's not all there is to it. You keeping awake like you are these last nights isn't a 'sometimes bad dream.'
[It's experience he speaks from and a hint of commiseration. Bellamy has spent a very long time with his nightmares.] I didn't sleep for weeks, after my mom was floated and Octavia was arrested. You don't have to pretend everything is fine.
That's the part I'm still working on, but I like to think I'm getting kinda better at it. Thing about the Drabwurld is that it's full of surprises. [Life in general is, really.
It's a little awkward still, mostly because he's still testing the waters of what is and isn't going to push Bellamy's buttons. Jason it's much easier to tell. Clarke he's not sure has buttons when it comes to him. But Bellamy's someone he (lately) admires quite a bit and the idea of accidentally messing that up isn't settling. Especially not now. He knows it's vague though so there's a little huff under his breath.]
No, but if I think about all there is to it, how'm I supposed to keep moving forward and focus on what's happening here? [It's a rhetorical question, mostly.] But I get it even though I think you're wrong still. It's not pretending if I acknowledge it when there's time. And...right now there isn't. [Not while they're on a mission. Still, there's a beat.] ...Bell? Did you watch your mom get floated?
[Again, not noticing he's shortened Bellamy's name. Oh well.]
I'll work on it with you, next time we get to training. [It's a casual offer, even Bellamy's tone is careless about it. It's a nonissue.]
[He frowns. Hiro is right, and Bellamy is plenty guilty of doing the same thing, refusing to acknowledge when he's not okay, especially if there are more pressing matters.] No, you're right. It's harder when the time isn't there. But you don't have to pretend right now.
[He doesn't answer the question right away. His eyebrows scrunch, and he's pointedly not looking at Hiro. Only belatedly does he realize what the kid's called him, and it's the nickname usage that has him answering honestly.] No. I wasn't allowed to be there.
[Since he wasn't the parent, there was no law that would float him. But he kept Octavia hidden alongside his mother. He was punished in other ways (no visitation to his sister, a demotion, a quiet empty apartment), that sometimes the floating felt like the kinder option.]
Whatever else I can do to arm myself is what I'll do. [Casual though it may be, he takes anything Bellamy offers to be very serious. He knows they're cut from the same pattern and have plenty of the same mannerisms, especially when it comes to things bothering them. When Bellamy tells him he doesn't have to pretend that he's fine, he hesitates, unsure of what that really means.
The hesitation seems to bring him the awareness needed to realize what he's done, and for a moment he looks a little embarrassed. He doesn't let that expression stay long though when Bellamy answers his question honestly.]
Maybe that would have been worse...not know what really happened. [A beat. And then:] ...there was a fire at our college during the big tech expo. I was presenting one of my inventions hoping to get accepted to the school, but right after that a really huge fire broke out and we heard that one of Tadashi's professors was trapped in the building. I tried to stop Tadashi from running back inside but he pulled away and ran up the stairs to the expo hall. [Bellamy can guess how the rest of this went. Tadashi exploded, and Hiro watched.]
That was the last time I saw him. Sometimes I still dream about it. Sometimes I wonder if I fought harder if I could have stopped him from running inside. [A deep breath.] I tried to follow him but I didn't get far before things made it impossible to go after him. But I--we're in the Drabwurld. That's why I push past it.
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...Octavia kinda told me a little bit about what you found on the ground. ["Mentioned a dude named Lincoln." He picks up on the tone though and it's the reason he doesn't say "you guys" or anything. He knows Bellamy enough by now to realize that the man probably bulldozed his way through and made things happen. They're similar that way.] Doesn't seem much different than watching what's out here. I'm used to being on the lookout from the sky though.
[He narrows his eyes.] I have, too. [Not this many nights in a row, however, and the wear and tear's a bit more obvious.] I used to pull a lot of all-nighters back home. It drove my aunt crazy.
[He shouldn't ask. He shouldn't, but he knows if he doesn't it'll keep bothering him.] ...what's been keeping you up anyway?
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[But then he frowns a little, because, well, he loves and trusts Octavia, but there's no telling what her version of events might be. His sister is as quick to his defense as she is to call him out on his shit.] We found a lot more shit than we were expecting. People included.
We had a wall. We watched from behind it, mostly. But we learned how to move through the trees too. At least it prepared me for guard duty here.
[Bellamy narrows his eyes right back.] All nighters at home are a little different from all nighters in a war zone.
[The better question would be what doesn't keep him up? Sometimes it feels like the list rotates, alternates, repeats itself; each night could be something else. Nightmares always seems to be a Big Theme, but it's just one part of his life at this point. He's forgotten what it was like to not have them.]
[He tries for blase. It's enemy territory, duh.] In case you haven't noticed, we're smack dab in Glaschu.
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[With that, Baymax's chip goes back into his pocket.] She mentioned that, too. About meeting people on the ground, but nothing about a wall. [Kinda reminds him of Eren a little.] I don't even know if I've ever asked how long you guys were on the ground before you got here.
[He doesn't give in to that, just keeping that level stare. Sorry, Bell, you're not gonna win. He's had practice...but he's ignoring him. Bellamy's right. All nighters here are different than all nighters back home so instead of verbally responding he settles for curling up a little further into his sweater and leaning into the tree.
He blinks though. That's hardly a cause for anything, considering what else he knows about Bellamy. It's something to worry about, yes, but at the same time...] Being in Glaschu's something to worry about, sure, but this also isn't your first time here. That's why Clarke sent me with you. [i.e. nice try but try again.]
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We built it for defense, once we realized we weren't alone. Our original camp's gone now, but the Ark followed us, put up a brand new wall with it. [Does he sound bitter at the Ark?? Yes, absolutely, always. He pauses though, thinks. How long were they on the Ground? It felt like an impossibly long time, but it couldn't have been more than two months.] A couple weeks. We've been here longer.
[Excuse you, Hiro, Bellamy has a little sister, so he's got just as much practice with the whole leveled stare thing. He doesn't necessarily give in either, but it does make him a little less stubborn about hiding how tired he is. He sinks back into a tree himself with a sigh.] And because sending you by yourself wasn't the best idea. I wanted to come check out the riots for myself anyway. I've been to Parrais and Daona, but not this middle of nowhere. Pretty sure Glaschu's not the thing keeping you awake either.
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[He'll share what happened in due time, probably. Maybe. For now he's letting his attention shift.] So really what you're saying is that it was less of a wall and more of a cage. Something to keep you guys boxed in and "safe" from outsiders. [He doesn't know anything about the grounders and how dangerous they were, but it seems strange to him.] It's weird how long we've been here.
[Well see, then Bellamy should know that the younger sibling always wins by default. His free hand is twisting and tugging on the fabric of his hoodie, fingers digging into the cuff of his sleeve as he thinks about that. Okay, that's a fair point.] Maybe Glaschu's not the thing keeping me awake but it's the new thing. Lately I've been going places I shouldn't be going. Things tend to happen in those places, so...just kinda more on guard than usual.
[There's another pause, and then, quickly:] Can I ask you something?
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[Which is probably the first time Bellamy has hinted at his less than stellar monarch feelings in front of Hiro, but moving along.]
[He makes a face.] It was a wall, around our camp and the dropship. [A beat.] They tore it down, in the end, but it kept us safe as long as it needed to.
[Bellamy already knows there's far more keeping Hiro awake, but at least he's admitting it. He uses it as an excuse to avoid talking about himself for now.] "Things tend to happen" is pretty vague. This relate to the Shuck? [Because lbr - the Shuck can be fucking terrifying, and he already knows Hiro left the encounter worse for wear. Quendi falls under places he shouldn't be going.]
[A quick nod. He's not sure when he stopped minding random questions like this.] What?
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He's not hearing the difference, really.] It's still a barrier to trap you in. But if it kept you safe in the end, I guess it doesn't matter anymore. [Things in Bellamy's world are still confusing sometimes.
His nostrils flare a bit in response. Yes it relates to Shuck, but he's not exactly sure he's ready to broach that. So instead, he waves a hand to blow it off for this very moment to charge ahead and flip the questions back to Bellamy. That response should also be enough to confirm that that's a yes. He'll explain soon enough.
And really, most likely Bellamy stopped minding them around the time he accidentally adopted a Disney character.] ...have you had any weird dreams lately?
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[There's a lot of brush offs happening, but Bellamy's not particularly surprised. He doesn't even mind the dream question at the moment, because, well, he'd been intending to ask Hiro about a dream.]
Weird's a pretty broad definition here. [A beat.] Good weird, bad weird? Ridiculous, horrifying, dwarven?
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So. When Bellamy mentions exactly what he's thinking Hiro fixes him with a flat sort of look before his hand digs into the ground next to him, fistful of leaves suddenly flying toward Bellamy's face.]
So you do know what I'm asking you. [He rolls his eyes.] ...Jason called and he told me that Clarke told him about a certain dream she had last night. You had it, too? I didn't get a ton of the details.
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No, I didn't know, but it's the second time Clarke and I had that dream. We thought it'd be a good idea to ask you about it.
[But then he just kind of launches into it. Neither of them are sleeping, the dream is important - there's no point in keeping it from Hiro.] It was a bunch of mechanical monsters. Presumably built by dwarves, but they're just - wrecking everything in their path. Spreading fire, targeting spires, and it looked like they definitely had shards for eyes. You get any sign of that when you poked around?
[There are more details he could give if asked, but he already looks pretty alarmed by rehashing the small bit so far.]
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The real reason he's getting closer though is to lower his voice. He doesn't trust Glaschu and he sure as hell doesn't want anyone hearing about this particular piece of the puzzle.]
Yeah...? Jason mentioned that. [There's an awkward, almost guilty pause.] I...haven't had a chance to go look yet. [That's the problem. After Quendi, things kinda go out of hand.] As soon as we get back to Dorchadas, I'm gonna grab Loki and we have to go. We can't wait any longer.
[He scrubs a hand over his face, blinking sleepily but powering through it for the time being. This is too important.] What else did you see? I need to know what we're really looking for.
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I wasn't sure if you might've seen hints of it, when you tried talking to the dwarves the last time.
[Don't think he doesn't notice the sudden sullenness. He kind of wishes they didn't have to talk about this right now, not when Hiro's already in a not so great state, but there's no way to let it go, especially if Hiro's going there soon.]
They were built of shit like cogs and gears. The sounds they made - like iron meeting steel, nothing animal or humanlike, and they looked a little dragonlike, especially in the mouth. Everything was already on fire in the dream, but I'm pretty sure the machines had to be most of the cause.
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I didn't get inside the city when I talked to them last time, just Redgate. I didn't want to push my luck before I even established anything, but you've heard the rumors, right? They're kicking everybody out. It's gonna be even harder to get inside now.
[He's burying a hand in his hair, tugging a little partially to keep himself awake and partially to keep himself grounded. He doesn't like the sound of this. Judging from some of the things he did learn about the dwarves and knowing that a certain Seelie had an apprenticeship there and was learning certain things, he doesn't like the idea at all.]
There's nothing proving that it's them making these things. [...but who else could it be, realistically?] We also don't know the vision's gonna come true. [It's clear he's starting to be a little more freaked out by the idea though.] ...if Loki and I get in, we'll keep an eye out. I'm just really, really hoping they're only dreams and not another thing we've gotta worry about.
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[He doesn't like the idea of Hiro going there now either, especially in the wake of the difficulties, but -] When you go, take my knife. The teleporting one. I want you to be able to get out of there fast.
[He can deal without having it for a day or so, if it means Hiro has a means of escape.]
Some of the visions people've had in the past have come true, or started to come true, or've been partially true. I don't like that we've had this one again, months after the first time back in February.
You're right. It doesn't necessarily mean it's an absolute, but it'd be stupid to not be cautious. If they're making monsters with shards for eyes, it means they've built up a collection of shards too.
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I don't like that it's reoccurring either. I've got a few people I could ask but...[Well, they're Seelie. He's not going to even try just yet.] We're going to be really cautious until we figure out what's going on, and probably even more so when we have the answers. [A beat.] What bugs me is the fact that they have shards for eyes. If that's true...where did the dwarves get the shards in the first place? If they're the ones really making these things.
[And why are they making them is the other question.]
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[Bellamy absently wipes his bleeding finger and hand on his pants.] Your guess is as good as mine, though hopefully you'll end up with more than a guess.
Feels like just about every side is after shards. If the dwarves've got a hoard, it makes me wonder how long they've been collecting, or who might be handing them over. They pretty much lock themselves away and hate people, right? Hard to imagine them shard hunting.
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If I come out of there with only a guess, the whole thing's gonna be for nothing. [And he refuses to let it be so.] I had that same thought. It's not so much that they hate people but they totally believe shardbearer business is shardbearer business. They'll do whatever it takes to keep themselves protected though. That's the thing. If they think this is the best way...it makes you wonder what they know or what they think that's making them so desperate. But I wanna know who's handing them over, too. Other shardbearers? The Cult? We have too many options.
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[Dryly:] The world is ending. Pretty sure that makes anyone take it up a level in what they feel is necessary to survival. [And, you know, even when it's not technically ending, but the Void looming certainly hammers that home.] Maybe they just think Shardbearers suck at this point like half the rest of the population does.
[He lets out an exhausted, bitter sigh.] Wouldn't be surprised if it was the Cult, to be honest.
We aren't gonna get answers now, just - keep it all in mind, when you go looking.
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But I'm always keeping them in mind. For all we know, we're going to be among them in the riots tomorrow. Maybe that's what worries me a little more. We never know.
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The Cult can be anywhere. Wouldn't be surprised if they're helping instigate the riots. [He really hopes they aren't there though - he'd rather them not pick him out of the crowd.]
[He nudges Hiro a little with his elbow.] Cult's not keeping you awake with everything else, is it?
[He says it vaguely sympathetically. Bellamy is more than familiar what that feelings is like.]
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[Like when Callaghan used the fire as an excuse to steal Hiro's microbots, for instance.
The little nudge brings him back to reality though and he looks up at Bellamy with wide eyes. For a moment it's so startlingly familiar that he's not sure what to do and he stares before reminding himself that despite how it may seem sometimes, Bellamy isn't Tadashi. There's a deep inhale as he debates how to answer, if he wants to give him the truth or just a lie of omission. In the end, he shakes his head.]
Sort of. There's a ton of stuff to think about here and that includes the Cult. [He's really only addressed this with Jason before, and even then it was more Jason knew because Jason understood. Actually verbalizing it is a whole other animal.] Sleeping's always been a little weird since Tadashi died, even though it's been almost two years if you count the time we've spent here.
[He doesn't outright say it, but it should be enough to let Bellamy know just how recent Tadashi's death is.] Sometimes I still dream about home. Sometimes they're good dreams, and sometimes they're not. That's all.
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[There's a small moment of hesitation when Hiro looks up at him like that, but at least it doesn't scare him. It doesn't even make him uncomfortable. When Hiro starts talking about Tadashi though - Bellamy's body sinks, not in uncertainty but just recognition of the moment for what it is. And he listens.]
You realize how vague that sounds, right? [The words are dismissive strung together like that, but his tone is concerned. Two years, and Tadashi died right before Hiro got yanked into another world. He kind of has the urge to just drop a blanket on the kid's head.] That's not all there is to it. You keeping awake like you are these last nights isn't a 'sometimes bad dream.'
[It's experience he speaks from and a hint of commiseration. Bellamy has spent a very long time with his nightmares.] I didn't sleep for weeks, after my mom was floated and Octavia was arrested. You don't have to pretend everything is fine.
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It's a little awkward still, mostly because he's still testing the waters of what is and isn't going to push Bellamy's buttons. Jason it's much easier to tell. Clarke he's not sure has buttons when it comes to him. But Bellamy's someone he (lately) admires quite a bit and the idea of accidentally messing that up isn't settling. Especially not now. He knows it's vague though so there's a little huff under his breath.]
No, but if I think about all there is to it, how'm I supposed to keep moving forward and focus on what's happening here? [It's a rhetorical question, mostly.] But I get it even though I think you're wrong still. It's not pretending if I acknowledge it when there's time. And...right now there isn't. [Not while they're on a mission. Still, there's a beat.] ...Bell? Did you watch your mom get floated?
[Again, not noticing he's shortened Bellamy's name. Oh well.]
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[He frowns. Hiro is right, and Bellamy is plenty guilty of doing the same thing, refusing to acknowledge when he's not okay, especially if there are more pressing matters.] No, you're right. It's harder when the time isn't there. But you don't have to pretend right now.
[He doesn't answer the question right away. His eyebrows scrunch, and he's pointedly not looking at Hiro. Only belatedly does he realize what the kid's called him, and it's the nickname usage that has him answering honestly.] No. I wasn't allowed to be there.
[Since he wasn't the parent, there was no law that would float him. But he kept Octavia hidden alongside his mother. He was punished in other ways (no visitation to his sister, a demotion, a quiet empty apartment), that sometimes the floating felt like the kinder option.]
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The hesitation seems to bring him the awareness needed to realize what he's done, and for a moment he looks a little embarrassed. He doesn't let that expression stay long though when Bellamy answers his question honestly.]
Maybe that would have been worse...not know what really happened. [A beat. And then:] ...there was a fire at our college during the big tech expo. I was presenting one of my inventions hoping to get accepted to the school, but right after that a really huge fire broke out and we heard that one of Tadashi's professors was trapped in the building. I tried to stop Tadashi from running back inside but he pulled away and ran up the stairs to the expo hall. [Bellamy can guess how the rest of this went. Tadashi exploded, and Hiro watched.]
That was the last time I saw him. Sometimes I still dream about it. Sometimes I wonder if I fought harder if I could have stopped him from running inside. [A deep breath.] I tried to follow him but I didn't get far before things made it impossible to go after him. But I--we're in the Drabwurld. That's why I push past it.
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