It was stupid and I would have done the same thing if it was you. I'd do it again if it meant another chance at bringing him back. You can't tell me that you wouldn't risk everything if Octavia disappeared tomorrow, that you wouldn't do whatever it took to try and get her back.
( because even now, Clarke would return to the gem and try to reactivate Jason's shard if she was able to; she can't anymore, not with the lack of her own shard in her chest, but she would if it were possible. she'd do it every time, repeatedly, if there was even the smallest chance that what she was doing could bring Jason back to the Drabwurld; she'd do it for Bellamy, too.
she's trying to be sympathetic, trying to be understanding, but all of her emotions feel so much bigger than the rest of her right now that she might just winds up feeling conflicted. she's sad about her own death, disappointed that she failed in bringing Jason back, guilty that Jason's gone and Bellamy's devastated by her own mistakes. all of it is a chemical storm of feelings in her chest, and Clarke can't make sense of any of it right now. )
no subject
( because even now, Clarke would return to the gem and try to reactivate Jason's shard if she was able to; she can't anymore, not with the lack of her own shard in her chest, but she would if it were possible. she'd do it every time, repeatedly, if there was even the smallest chance that what she was doing could bring Jason back to the Drabwurld; she'd do it for Bellamy, too.
she's trying to be sympathetic, trying to be understanding, but all of her emotions feel so much bigger than the rest of her right now that she might just winds up feeling conflicted. she's sad about her own death, disappointed that she failed in bringing Jason back, guilty that Jason's gone and Bellamy's devastated by her own mistakes. all of it is a chemical storm of feelings in her chest, and Clarke can't make sense of any of it right now. )
I'm sorry, Bellamy.